For those who think Democracy should be
a collaborative experience.
October 7, 2008
Poison Phrase ~ If you believe that, you’ll believe anything
It was a political conversation, but this kind of attack happens in business and personal conversations. When Julie disagreed with Lorrie’s opinion about a national policy, instead of addressing the issue directly, Julie said,
- If you believe that, you’ll believe anything.
It’s called attacking the messenger, and it’s a bully tool to end reasonable dialogue. Respond by saying,
I offered a sincere opinion and you replied by painting me as gullible. Please point out the flaws in the argument instead of me.
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Related posts which may interest you
- If you wish they’d think more like you do, you need to be able to think like they do
- Blog guidelines: How to start a reasonable dialogue about reasonable dialogue
- A Political First Date – What not to say
- Communication Question – talking with your political opposite
- Reader question ~Who’s entitled to an opinion?
More Presidential ~ Grace under Fire
Unite and Concur took on Divide and Conquer at the first presidential debate. The post debate spin was clear that John McCain came across as more combative and Barrack Obama came across as more conciliatory. McCain hit attack and did not engage Obama directly, while Obama looked to McCain as he spoke and acknowledged points of agreement. The McCain campaign had an ad out before midnight showing a medley of clips of Obama telling McCain where he agreed with him. The McCain campaign clearly thought the acknowledgement would make Obama look weak, and many Obama supporters voiced the same concern. Some suggested that Obama showed grace under fire, and wondered if that would play well on Main street.
The debate tested Unite and Concur principles, and it passed the test.
Obama was regarded as appearing “more presidential” by 46% of debate watchers, in contrast to the 33% who regarded McCain as more presidential.
As the author of Unite and Concur, I encourage all of us to show grace under fire and to appear presidential when our political ideas are challenged. The verdict is in and the polls have shown – grace under fire and a collaborative approach to dialogue is effective.
February 8, 2008What not to say ~ “How does it feel to have abandoned the cause of your life?”
A cable news show host opened his interview with a feminist political commentator who had just endorsed Obama with the question:
- How does it feel to have abandoned the cause of your life?
This remark is riddled with logical fallacies.
1) Absolute language / false dichotomy: It speaks of causes in black and white terms. Even if supporting a male candidate over a female one was a deviation for a feminist, that wouldn’t qualify as “abandoning the cause of your life.”
2) Reductive: It summarizes a complex situation simplistically.
3) Ad hominen attack: It attacks the person instead of the person’s position.
4) Assumption treated as fact.
Watch for fallacies in your own political conversations. Any time someone makes a claim or asks a question based on an assumption that is unwarranted, address the assumption instead of responding to the point made based on the fallacy.
You can read more about fallacies, here.
The woman who this comment targeted said: “Hardballs are just part of the game — and I am happy to stand in the batter’s box and take any of them on. But spitballs aren’t part of the game.”
It’s not part of the game for you either.
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Related posts which may interest you
- Get real ~ You can wish your candidate had more experience AND still support him or her
- Old school politics ~ I’m voting for Hillary because I’m a woman
- Blog guidelines: How to start a reasonable dialogue about reasonable dialogue
- Guest post ~ here to serve…a growing sense of order
- What’s wrong with this picture?: Huge profit opportunities
A Political First Date – What not to say
Some If you try to start a reasonable political dialogue, think of it like a Political First Date. Put your best foot forward without putting a false front forward. The idea is: be who you are and still get a second date. Don’t respond to other people’s political ideas with comments like:
- If you believe that, you’ll believe anything.
- When did you stop thinking for yourself?
- People like you are what’s wrong with America.
What have people said to you that shut down dialogue for you? Please keep the focus of your comments on communication. You’ll find some exploratory blog guidelines in this post.
Unite and Concur Pressroom